Being needed isn't the same as leading.

I used to think being "always available" made me a good leader.

Midnight ping? Answered.
Holiday weekend? Replied.
Quick review request? Sure, send it over.

I thought this was service. 

What I was actually building was a culture that couldn't move without me.

Projects froze while I slept.
My calendar filled with "quick" requests that swallowed entire days.
The team stopped trusting their own judgment because mine was always accessible.

One rough week made it clear: I wasn't leading. I was rescuing.

So I ran an experiment. Five days. One rule.

The rule: If they can answer it, they answer it. My inbox is for decisions only they can't make.

Here's the experiment if you want to try it:

Day 1: Tell your team the new rule. "For the next five days, I'm only available for decisions that truly require me. Everything else - trust yourself."

Days 2-4: When a question lands that they could solve, respond with: "What's your instinct?" or "What would you do if I weren't available?" Then let them do that.

Day 5: Notice what happened. Track how many "urgent" things resolved themselves. Watch for who stepped up.

What to watch for:

• Messages get shorter
• Decisions happen without you
• Your calendar has actual space in it
• The team starts trusting themselves

The real shift: Your attention has become their oxygen supply. This experiment lets everyone breathe on their own.

Your brain will tell you everything will collapse without you.
That's the lie that's been keeping you trapped.
The team you built is more capable than you've let them prove

But what you’re really doing is devoting yourself to deeper leadership… the kind that builds people up instead of making them dependent.

And that makes teams infinitely stronger… and your calendar infinitely freer. 

Try it for five days. See what opens up.

Marissa

P.S. If you already know your availability is costing you but you're not sure how to restructure without everything falling apart - that's exactly what we sort out in an advisor call. 45 minutes to map the boundaries your team actually needs from you. Book yours here.